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May 27, 2014

URGENT PLEASE READ AND ADOPT!

RULES OF THE EMAIL WORLD, AND WHY I AM CONSIDERING SWITCHING BACK TO CARRIER PIGEON'S:

1. When either of us send each other an email there is no need to call or re-email each other to ask me if we got each others emails! HINT: That's how email works!

2. Receipt of any email generally does not require the reply. "OK", "Okey dokie","Roger!", "Got it!" or other benign response thus creating even more email.

3. When replying to any email if many people are cc'd on the string and you decide you want to converse, invite to dinner, reply with a funny, or otherwise direct your email to just one person on the string of recipients, no need to "REPLY ALL"

4. Re-read Rule number 3!

5. Re-Read Rule number 3 a third time!!!!!

6. When emailing anyone, slow down and take the time to put all three things you want to talk about in, oh I don't know, maybe the FIRST email, instead of rapid-fire sending off of three in a row because you hit "SEND" too soon...again!

7. No need to send a follow up email in between the 3 emails from rule number 6 stating that you "HIT SEND TOO SOON!" That's pretty dang clear!

8. Keeping in mind that many of us are busy, with meetings, travel, dinners, lunches, families, work, pets, boyfriends, girlfriends, children, plant care, lawn care, flight delays, events, your prior emails or maybe life>>> Calm down and give someone time to respond, before resending all previous emails. (This is related, albeit expanded from rule number 1.)

I currently have 50,555 email in my inbox for my various companies. 33,934 of those remain unread. I have designated 47 of you at this moment as VIP's meaning you have a special section that I check first. This does not include close friends, family or you, it's for the most part business related, travel related or Client related. Want to make it 48, 49 or perhaps 50 people with the special star? Then straighten up!

As for switching to Pigeon's? I'm currently looking at my available rooftop space in each city to determine feasibility of housing 1000-4500 methods of furry delivery and how much shit I'll have to clean up with each new message received. Oh wait that's the same as email....damn, funny how life seems to reinvent itself with every new technology eh?

That is all! ...SEND

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